Nonviolent Communication

Nonviolent communication was developed out of a belief that our culture has taught us to think and speak in ways that can actually perpetuate conflict, internal pain and even violence. Nonviolent communication is founded on the tenet that all human beings have the capacity for compassion and only resort to violence or behavior that harms themselves and others when they do not recognize more effective strategies for meeting needs. It is typically taught, often in a therapy session, as a process of interpersonal communication designed to improve compassion for, and connection to, others. Think this approach might be right for you? Reach out to one of TherapyDen’s nonviolent communication specialists today. 

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Do you want to resolve conflicts - with yourself and others - in ways that honor your deepest needs? Do you want solutions that work for you and also meet the needs of others? Nonviolent Communication is about how to make that happen. It's about creating the kind of relationship that helps to meet, or at least honor, everyone's needs. It doesn't always get us what we want, but it greatly increases the chances of truly satisfying our underlying needs.

— Carlyle Stewart, Counselor in Asheville, NC

It can be difficult to explore our inner world when we lack the words and structure necessary to communicate them effectively. For years I have incorporated Nonviolent Communication perspectives of human feelings and needs in order to empower clients to request from others what they need out of their relationships. I developed my approach through training with practitioners and Nonviolent Communication trainers as a part of my graduate studies.

— Dylan Keenberg, Clinical Psychologist in Bellingham, WA
 

Compassion is key to our work together, as is developing an awareness of your worth and your values. In a relationship with others, NVC helps us recognize that we are all autonomous beings and effective, clear communication is key to getting our needs met. It removes the "good" and "bad" labels we may impose on things and instead encourages us to be curious and nonjudgmental. It's quite liberating!

— Shelby Dwyer, Counselor in Boston, MA

I have found nonviolent communication to be extremely helpful in clearer and more accurate expression. Additionally, the use of nonviolent communication bypasses many of the standard miscommunications and perceived offenses of standard conversation, facilitating information flow without argument. Interestingly, the use of nonviolent communication may also make the speaker appear more charismatic and persuasive.

— Erica Rampelberg, Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor in Columbus, OH
 

Most of us have been taught to communicate passively, critically, or manipulatively––and that’s so normal to us that we don’t even realize we’re doing it. That is, until we find ourselves feeling powerless to get our needs met, repeating the same conflicts with those we love, and feeling alone or trapped in our relationships. The nonviolent framework provides a systematic approach by teaching us to be present to our own needs, feelings, and requests without blaming others or internalizing shame.

— Alexa Golding, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in Los Angeles, CA

NVC teaches us to understand and know what our needs and feelings are. I come back again and again to this practice with clients, no matter the circumstance.

— Meg Mattingly, Licensed Professional Counselor in Austin, TX
 

NVC is the practice of making an observation, expressing a feeling, then a need and making a request. Using NVC takes the charge out of communication which can be so painful and threatening to the survival of the relationship. It allows people to take ownership of their experience and not direct their feelings towards others, which usually only escalates conflict and leads to breakdowns. Utilizing NVC makes hearing one another much easier by staying calm & cool.

— Annette Barnett, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in Saratoga, CA

NVC is the practice of making an observation, expressing a feeling, then a need and making a request. Using NVC takes the charge out of communication which can be so painful and threatening to the survival of the relationship. It allows people to take ownership of their experience and not direct their feelings towards others, which usually only escalates conflict and leads to breakdowns. Utilizing NVC makes hearing one another much easier by staying calm & cool.

— Annette Barnett, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in Saratoga, CA

Communication is a struggle for many people. We want to feel heard and hear others. I use NVC to help people learn how to communicate better and to listen with love.

— Michaela Finley, Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Downingtown, PA
 

Often we struggle within our relationships due to a lack of understanding of how to communicate. Nonviolent communication gives us a good framework to learn the art of communication.

— Kimberly Perlin, Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Towson, MD

Learning to identify, express, and share our feelings and needs can change both how we relate to ourselves and to others. When we don't know how we are feeling, how can someone comfort or reassure us? Together we find a way for you to not only know what you feel and need but also to trust in yourself enough to ask for it from your family, partner, and the world.

— Elizabeth McGinnis, Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor in Menlo Park, CA
 

Using the Marshall Rosenberg model of NVC, I assist Clients with affective communication. Using "I" statements and having a relationship with their own feelings helps Clients to understand themselves and this helps them to convey their honest truth in a non-threatening manner.

— Sandra Fitting, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in San Geronimo, CA

I use Non-violent Communication (NVC) in my life both personally and professionally because it's such a direct way to speak to our feelings and needs while respecting ourselves and the person we're communicating with. I find it's most helpful as a tool when people are just beginning to speak more kindly to themselves and meet their needs. NVC is great for improving your self-talk, not just how you communicate with others!

— Elissa Burdick, Therapist in ,

The work of Marshall Rosenbaum has been instrumental in forming my practice. The strategies outlined by this practice are useful in working with families and couples. NVC helps people own their own emotions, not those of others.

— Mark Best, Clinical Social Worker in Vancouver, WA
 

Nonviolent Communication (NVC) is a wonderful technique for helping you connect to your own feelings and needs, and figure out ways to work through conflicts with others in a clear and compassionate way.

— Deborah Ranker, Clinical Social Worker in Portland, OR

Nonviolent Communication is the reason I became a therapist and the foundation of my work. I have completed several intensive trainings in NVC both in-person and online.

— Teresa Ponikvar, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in Campbell, CA