Codependency, sometimes referred to as “relationship addiction," describes sacrificing one’s personal needs to try to meet the needs of others. Although it is often associated with romantic relationships, codependency can be experienced in all types of close relationships, including with family and friendships.  Someone who is codependent has an extreme focus outside themselves. Their thoughts and actions revolve around other people, such as a spouse or relative or they build their identity on helping or “saving” other people. Codependents typically experience feelings of low self-esteem, anxiety and insecurity in these relationships and may also experience perfectionism and control issues. Codependent symptoms can worsen if left untreated. If you are worried that you might be codependent, reach out to one of TherapyDen’s codependency experts today!

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I help people clear away the unconscious patterns that keep people stuck in relationships that aren't generative and creative. We work on how to let go of power struggles and need for control; Balance needs for closeness and separateness; Increase intimacy by telling the mico-truths; Communicate in positive ways that stops arguments; Allow more pleasure and joy into your life. We learn the way to be fully together without giving up yourself.

— Jonathan Coopersmith, Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor Associate

Self esteem is essentially how we relate to ourselves and our world. It’s how we value ourselves, it’s a basis for our thoughts and behaviors, our attitudes and relationships. It’s where our self worth resides. We need self esteem to feel effective in managing our lives. Self esteem is self-empowering.

— Anne Rodic, Counselor in Pittsford, NY

Heal from trauma and abuse, rediscover your center, & learn to accept and love yourself. Honor where you are now, and know that you have the power to change things!

— Nini Gomes, Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Ellicott City, MD

Have you been feeling anxious, depressed, or find that you have a hard time saying no to people? Do you find that you often end up feeling like you need to help or fix a loved one's problems? Do you struggle with boundaries, people pleasing and unbalanced relationships? You don't have to do this alone. Having a therapist that's experienced in codependency treatment will support you in addressing underlying issues that have been keeping you stuck.

— Jennifer Leupp, Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Long Beach, CA

Working with substance use disorders for the past decade the two go hand and hand. Recognizing how experiences from childhood have resulted in maladaptive coping mechanisms, negative core beliefs, and the process of healing and replacing with healthy boundaries, effective communication, changed thought processes, resulting in increased self-esteem and self-worth.

— Denae Arnold, Licensed Professional Counselor in Wheatridge, CO

Knowing one's own desires, thoughts, and feelings is not a skill that all of us are taught in childhood. Therapy is a place to explore your truth in a kind, safe and empathic environment. Paying close attention to your emotional life will lead to a better understanding of yourself in relation to others. Becoming curious about your internal landscape will lead to a stronger sense of self.

— Jessica Heinfeld, Licensed Clinical Social Worker

Do you have trouble with people pleasing? Always focusing on external issues or everyone else’s issues which leads to you ignoring your own needs or being able to care for yourself? I can help! We will work together to understand your relationships throughout your life to understand what led you to this place and work to chip away to build healthy boundaries and how to learn or relearn how to care for your own needs and wants.

— Emmily Weldon, Counselor in Fort Lauderdale, FL

Codependency involves sacrificing your needs to try and meet the needs of other people in your life. It involves an extreme shift from you to other people and your thoughts and actions revolve around the people in your life. Codependency often appears in unhealthy and unbalanced relationships. Through therapy, we work on developing healthy boundaries in relationships, strategies to increase your self-esteem and autonomy, and learn coping mechanisms for separation and individuation.

— Daria Stepanian, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist

I have experience with 12-step recovery and love to support women and men dealing with adult-child issues, codependency, self-esteem, and developing healthy coping and self-care habits.

— Margarita Prensa, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in New York, NY

Codependency is getting needs met by meeting the needs of others. While this may not sound so bad at first, this pattern has the potential to cause wreckage in our personal experience in relationships, our career, etc. Counseling around codependent behaviors focuses on identifying my clients needs and supporting my client in getting their own needs met.

— Suzanne Cooper, Licensed Professional Counselor in Littleton, CO

YOUR FEELINGS MATTER. Your feelings point to your needs. You are not responsible for the feelings of others. Your natural care for others may be more fun when you are free from the impossible responsibility of managing their feelings. YOUR NEEDS MATTER. Let's take a fresh look at any obstacles to honoring your needs. Let's help you clarify your needs. Let's help you speak up for yourself in ways that work for you and also honor the needs of others.

— Carlyle Stewart, Counselor in Asheville, NC

I am Meadows Model and PIT trained in co-dependency and co-dependency recovery. I worked in a Meadows facility for nearly two years were I provided ongoing codependency treatment to individuals living with trauma and addiction.

— Alexandra Ludovina, Licensed Clinical Social Worker in Sunnyvale, CA

At its root, codependency is a struggle with valuing the self and in knowing what it means to set boundaries with others. We can often feel confused by feeling selfish if we value ourselves, or mean if we set boundaries. It can be helpful to have someone work through these confusing thoughts and feelings toward a way of being where we know who we are and how to care for others without compromising a core sense of self.

— Joseph Hovemeyer, Associate Marriage & Family Therapist in Sierra Madre, CA

Codependency means so much more than enabling with someone you love and today this idea has expanded to include adults who may or may not have lived with an addict. Codependency can more accurately be defined as the tendency to put others needs before your own; accommodating to others to such a degree that you tend to discount or ignore your own feelings, desires and basic needs.

— Gary Alexander, Therapist in Vancouver, WA

If you are a people pleaser or put others needs above your own there's a good chance that you are struggling with codependent behavior. Codependents put all of their energy into taking care of others often at their own expense and with little in return. This kind of behavior is also common in relationships where domestic violence is involved. I am a recovering codependent and I can help you to identify some of these behaviors and work towards being more assertive.

— Christine Cuhaciyan, Counselor in Seattle, WA

Do you struggle with interpersonal boundaries either finding yourself with no boundaries getting hurt often or putting up walls and feeling the pain of isolation? Do you find that you hold resentment, have distorted/nonexistent spirituality, avoid reality (e.g. through addictions), or have a hard time with sustaining intimacy with others? I provide a safe, nurturing environment where we can gently explore these areas to create new experiences with oneself and one’s past.

— Addie Michlitsch, Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor in Roseville, MN

Are you the one who always takes care of everything? Have you had to do things for yourself most of your life? "Codependency" is a big word that doesn't have to involve substance abuse. Ironically, its most common subjects describe themselves as "independent." If thinking about someone else's problems occupies more of your time than you'd like, let's talk.

— Kathryn Gates, Marriage & Family Therapist in Austin, TX

Co-dependency is so absolutely destructive in our lives. In my 20+ years of my own co-dependency recovery and helping others navigate through co-dependence, I am confident that understanding the roots of your codependency, how it impacts your relationships on a daily basis and finding recovery, might be the most impactful work that you can do as an adult.

— Kellie Rice, Psychologist in Chicago, IL

Understanding one’s wants and needs in relationships; exploring patterns of interaction; addressing concerns; speaking up for what you want in a constructive way; being seen and heard; and strengthening satisfaction in relationships.

— Marcelle Little, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist

Created and lead a relational codependency program and group, that was very successful. Can work one-on-one through the program, finding ways for clients to set boundaries with strength, increase self-esteem, and deepen relationships without enmeshment.

— Lauren Ogren, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist in San Rafael, CA