Codependency

I have vast experience working with clients in toxic relationships, helping individuals with a loved one who is self-destructive, and aiding those who have found themselves in very unhealthy connections. I will work with you on setting healthy boundaries, learn how to "hold on loosely," and learn how to say no, without feeling bad or somehow at fault. I have led support groups on this topic throughout my career.

A lot of times how we connect with others gets pathologized. The language of codependency is often stigmatizing. The work isn't to stop being "codependent," but rather about finding balance between being able to self-validate/regulate& recognizing when you need to lean on the support from others. I utilize the lens of "interdependency" to help clients recognize where their relational behaviors go into extremes and how they can find balance in their relationships.

Codependency can be a challenging thing to navigate on your own, but it is very possible to gain a more comprehensive and complete understanding of why you developed this coping mechanism in the first place. From there, we can support you to re-learn how to have your own autonomy and separate sense of self. If applicable to you, we'll also support you in learning how to discern and hold your own boundaries and connect with others in ways that are empowering for you.

Signs of codependency include: Difficulty making decisions in a relationship Difficulty identifying your feelings Difficulty communicating in a relationship Valuing the approval of others more than valuing yourself Lacking trust in yourself and having poor self-esteem Having fears of abandonment or an obsessive need for approval Having an unhealthy dependence on relationships, even at your own cost Having an exaggerated sense of responsibility for the actions of others

Codependency is when you struggle with prioritizing yourself or implementing healthy boundaries with others. You are typically more concerned with helping others feel okay about themselves and the world than you are thinking of yourself, your values, and your goals in life. If you struggle with codependency, you always feel the need to stuff your emotions so that others around you are not uncomfortable. Codependency is many other things, but you know it is too exhausting to be sustainable.

Co-dependency is so absolutely destructive in our lives. In my 20+ years of my own co-dependency recovery and helping others navigate through co-dependence, I am confident that understanding the roots of your codependency, how it impacts your relationships on a daily basis and finding recovery, might be the most impactful work that you can do as an adult.

Early childhood trauma can resurface in intimate relationships, and can manifest as codependent behavior patterns. I help clients develop self-compassion and awareness to break toxic relationship cycles.

Codependency is often tied to the relationships that we have with addicts in our lives. Codependency is often defined as behaviors that enable behaviors we wish to see the end of but it often comes from a place of love, care and concern for others. The problem is that love, care and concern can result in giving too much to others. My goal in helping clients who struggle with codependency is to help them establish healthy boundaries so they can be supportive without overwhelming themselves.

Boundaries, boundaries, BOUNDARIES!!

Signs of codependency include: Difficulty making decisions in a relationship Difficulty identifying your feelings Difficulty communicating in a relationship Valuing the approval of others more than valuing yourself Lacking trust in yourself and having poor self-esteem Having fears of abandonment or an obsessive need for approval Having an unhealthy dependence on relationships, even at your own cost Having an exaggerated sense of responsibility for the actions of others

If your relationship is not the place you want it to be. You would like to have a loving relationship with your partner and for some reason that not happening. I would like to help you figure out why. A codependent relationship in all of its form and simply a relationship is not working because of many different reasons. Sometimes it would help to have another person in the process to figure out why.

Co-dependency and people-pleasing go hand in hand. Often times, codependency is a symptom of a larger issue that's tied to safety and security in important relationships early on in life. I'm here to help you safely explore what's driving patterns of perfectionism, people-pleasing, and feelings of unworthiness so that you discover the freedom of living out of your most authentic, true self.

In my work with people who have characteristics of codependency, I have found that these people are some of the kindest people on our planet. They have huge hearts and tend to give their all to others. Unfortunately this often comes with self-neglect, low self-esteem, and entering into unhealthy relationships. I help these individuals learn how to use self-love and healthy boundaries.

When you give so much of yourself to others, it can feel like you lose parts of yourself in the process You might find it difficult to set boundaries or voice your true inner feelings. Together, you can learn to recognize and honor your inner voice, trust your intuition, and integrate the different parts of yourself enabling you to live life more fully and authentic to who you are.

YOUR FEELINGS MATTER. Your feelings point to your needs. You are not responsible for the feelings of others. Your natural care for others may be more fun when you are free from the impossible responsibility of managing their feelings. YOUR NEEDS MATTER. Let's take a fresh look at any obstacles to honoring your needs. Let's help you clarify your needs. Let's help you speak up for yourself in ways that work for you and also honor the needs of others.

Codependency is getting needs met by meeting the needs of others. While this may not sound so bad at first, this pattern has the potential to cause wreckage in our personal experience in relationships, our career, etc. Counseling around codependent behaviors focuses on identifying my clients needs and supporting my client in getting their own needs met.

Do you spend too much time thinking about other people? Are your needs usually on the back-burner because you are worried about the needs of others in your life? Do you feel responsible for the happiness of others? If any of this resonates with you, you may have difficulty prioritizing your own needs and setting healthy boundaries in your relationships. Let’s work together to establish (or re-establish) a healthy relationship with yourself.

I specialize in working with clients who would like to address attachment wounds and address patterns, beliefs and behaviors that increase codependency. I strive to help my clients create healthy relationships with the self and others that include compassion, vulnerability, honesty and boundaries.

I have worked on and developed codependency groups, primarily for women. Many people struggle with codependency, and sometimes just don't know what it's called. They are often seen struggling to say no to people, over extended themselves, and feeling that they give and give and no one ever returns the favor.

At its root, codependency is a struggle with valuing the self and in knowing what it means to set boundaries with others. We can often feel confused by feeling selfish if we value ourselves, or mean if we set boundaries. It can be helpful to have someone work through these confusing thoughts and feelings toward a way of being where we know who we are and how to care for others without compromising a core sense of self.