Tom Bolls

If you’ve gone through a traumatic experience, you may be struggling with upsetting emotions, frightening memories, or a sense of constant danger that you just can’t kick. Or you may feel numb, disconnected, and unable to trust other people. Here are some commonly overlooked sources of emotional trauma: Serious physical injuries Emotional or physical abuse by a parent The sudden death of someone close An auto accident The breakup of a significant relationship I'd like to help.

Common Issues Explored in Couples Therapy We drifted apart after the birth of our children. My partner and I frequently argue about money. We are struggling with sexual difficulties and lack of desire. My partner had an affair, and I find it difficult to trust again. We can’t stop arguing over the most insignificant details. I fear that my partner might be addicted to drugs / alcohol. My partner is getting close to someone else. Should I worry? I constantly feel blamed and criticized.

Do you find it hard to control your emotions? Do your emotions often dictate your response? Do you wish you had the techniques to harness your emotions and move forward with your life? Become more aware of your emotions Welcome, allow and regulate emotions Describe emotions clearly and in detail Evaluate whether the emotions are helpful or hurtful Identify the source of unhelpful emotions Develop alternative, healthy ways of coping with situations that often elicit hurtful emotions

A PACT couple session may differ somewhat from what clinicians and couples experience in other forms of couple therapy. A PACT therapist’s focus on moment-to-moment shifts in a client’s face, body, and voice, and each partner’s active involvement in paying close attention to these as a couple. A PACT therapist creates experiences similar to those troubling a relationship and helps the couple work through them in real time during the session. PACT sessions often exceed the 50-minute hour

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) is a psychotherapy that enables people to heal from the symptoms and emotional distress that are the result of disturbing life experiences. Repeated studies show that by using EMDR therapy people can experience the benefits of psychotherapy that once took years to make a difference. It is widely assumed that severe emotional pain requires a long time to heal. EMDR therapy shows that the mind can in fact heal from psychological trauma.

John Gottman's research found that emotionally intelligent couples are intimately familiar with each other’s worlds. They know each other’s goals in life, worries, and dreams. Without such a love map, you can’t know your partner. From knowledge springs not only love, but the fortitude to weather marital storms. Couples who have detailed love maps of each other’s worlds are far better prepared to cope with stressful events and conflict.